NIGEL KNEALE'S BEASTS - WHAT BIG EYES (1976)

 

DIRECTED by Donald McWhinnie

SCREENPLAY by Nigel Kneale 

STARRING - Michael Kitchen as Bob Curry, Patrick Magee as Leo Raymount, Madge Ryan as Florence Raymount.

PLOT - Bob Curry is an RSPCA animal welfare officer who is investigating the illegal shipping of wolves to the home of an eccentric scientist - Leo Raymount.

Upon arriving at Raymount's ramshackle home inhabited by the scientist and his daughter, Bob begins to realise that all is not as it seems. Raymount is obsessed with the idea of Lycanthropy (the ability that enables man to transform into wolf) to the point that he's using real wolves to experiment upon. Has the insane scientist unlocked the arcane science that will allow him to become a werewolf ?...

PERFORMANCES - When I recently reviewed the previous episode of Beasts, I'd formulated a theory that one of the recurring tropes of this series is that the main male character in every story is a total arsehole. Well, no sooner had I opened my mouth than I went and watched this episode - which completely shoots my argument down...sort of.

The point is that the main male character in this story is actually (SHOCK HORROR) a pretty decent bloke. Bob (Michael Kitchen) is a thoroughly nice chap - he's an animal lover who works for the RSPCA as an animal welfare officer - his job is to protect vulnerable innocent animals from cruelty, you really don't get a much better man than that. To be fair he's pretty straightlaced and perhaps not the most interesting character we've seen in this series but he certainly breaks the pattern of total dickheads that we've been party to so far in this series, so for that alone he makes a refreshing change. Kitchen gives a decent enough performance of a fairly bland but likeable character.

It's when we come to the villain of the piece that the arsehole male trope kicks into effect again (obviously you'd expect the villain to be a bit of a dick, otherwise he wouldn't be the villain but in this case there's still some recurring themes carried over from some of the other male characters seen so far in Beasts).

The villain/arsehole of the week in question is Leo Raymount played with scenery chewing intensity by British horror movie veteran Patrick Magee. He's by far the best thing about the episode - his character is totally unhinged. Raymount is an elderly reclusive scientist who has become obsessed with the idea of becoming a werewolf and has started experimenting on real wolves to try to create a chemical that will enable him to transform himself.

The main thing about Raymount that keeps him roughly in line with some of the other shining examples of manhood we've seen in this series is the way he treats his daughter Florence (Madge Ryan). A quick word about Ryan's casting here, whilst she does put in a very nice performance as the repressed, downtrodden and ultimately resentful daughter of an egomaniac, there's ABSOLUTELY NO WAY that Madge Ryan could EVER pass for Patrick Magee's daughter - SHE LOOKS ABOUT THE SAME AGE AS HE DOES (if not actually slightly older) FOR CRYING OUT LOUD !!!!

If for whatever reason they couldn't get a younger actress for the role why not just adjust the script slightly and make Florence his sister instead ? It'd make absolutely no difference to the story, Raymount could still completely dominate her with his control freak personality. It makes no sense.

Anyway, Magee puts in a great performance - that manages to straddle that fine line between OTT camp and sinister creepiness. Easily one of the best performances of this series so far.

SFX - Considering this is a story about a man wanting to transform into a werewolf, you'd think there would be a werewolf transformation scene right ? Obviously not on the level of, say, American Werewolf In London (a definite no, no on a 70's ITV budget), but at least a quick camera dissolve to Patrick Magee wearing some joke shop plastic horror fangs with a bit of hair stuck to his face ? But no...you get absolutely NOWT. Move on... nothing to see here...

VIOLENCE - Well...Raymount mistreats a wild wolf (off camera) and Bob has to euthanise it, which is sad.

Apart from that... nothing. Raymount dies when he consumes the "werewolf" potion (Magee acting "poisoned" is REALLY going for top position in the high camp stakes). When Raymount lies "dead" we can blatantly see that Magee is still breathing...which takes you out of the scene just a tad but is unintentionally funny all the same.

RATING - By far the worst episode of the series so far. It has it's enjoyable moments (any scene with Magee in it basically), but the whole thing just adds up to a whole lot of nothing.

The ending is a HUGE anticlimax, to the point that you sit there contemplating your life choices afterwards. There's some unintentional camp in there to enjoy but overall this one's a bit of a damp squib really.

3 mad old buggers out of 5. Disappointing.